Thursday, 30 June 2011

I Surf Now

        I have found since turning forty..ump#hin&din that there really is a mid life crisis thingy.  I thought people that went through that sort of thing just didn't have their coconuts in a row.   Now I find myself watching a surfing documentary and searching Kijiji for a long board and a wet suit.  The fact that I'm afraid of sharks, jellyfish, crabs and anything related to the ocean really never crossed my mind.  Could it be? Are my coconuts not in a row? 
      Instead of buying dust collecting surf gear my fella closed my laptop and instructed me rent some gear and give it an afternoon try. So that's what I'm gonna do.  Tomorrow I will make my way to Lawrencetown Beach and see if the waves are (insert surf lingo meaning incredible here).  Then I will head to the surf shop and not even pretend to act like I know what I'm doing. 
       Something tells me deep in the primitive part of my brain, you know the part,  the area that tells you not to touch that hot stove or walk over that cliff, that I should not do this alone.  But I can't ask my feller to join me.  He doesn't know how to swim and that would be just too much to heap on my plate.  Imagine it.  The riptide sending us towards Sable Island as his grip lets go and he floats down to his watery grave not unlike Jack in Titanic because Rose just couldn't make room for him on that raft.  No, not unlike lovemaking, this must be done by myself.   
          So on Canada Day, that's where you'll find me.  Tussling on the ocean looking for the perfect wave.    I must summon the courage my surfing brethren so often have done and paddle out.  Because in the end, for all of us, it will come down to just you.  You, the board, the wave, and your will.  Oh who am I kidding.  I'll be the amorphous blob in the wetsuit on the shore's edge squealing that something touched my foot. 



Yeah, this looks about right.

Wednesday, 22 June 2011

If it can't BE Summer, it can FEEL like Summer.

We've all heard the refrain. "WHERE'S SUMMER"?  With Weather conditions in the dumper, Summer for us Maritimers sadly, has to be a state of mind.  And there's no better way to convince yourself than to blur that mind with alcohol.  Found some 2011 Summer Drink suggestions!   I will start with the cherry caipirissima and try everyone until I fall down drunk or lose a finger in the blender!!!!   See you in Emergency!

http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2011/06/22/dining/20110622-summer-drink-recipes.html/?smid=tw-nytimes

Sunday, 19 June 2011

Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day Video.  Love this!

Saturday, 18 June 2011

I need a good book.

  Summer's here, I'm beach bound and I need something to read. I hate the beach but the man I'm with loves sunbathing.  Before I met him I never stepped foot on a beach in the summer.  Why would you?  . Sand's fun right.  It follows you home in the car.  Hides in every crack and crevise and at 45, I've got a few more cracks and crevices than I did when I was twenty.   Plus you've got to hide from the sun or else you're playin' connect the liver spots.  No if I'm at the beach I'm on a blanket under an umbrella hopefully lost in a book.  (now that you've got a good Jessica Tandy visual, let's begin).
         Before you start hollerin' titles at me let me state this for the record:  I won't waste the strength it would take to open my eyelids for an author like Maeve Binchy or Danielle Steel. I can hear you now, "Oh what's your pleasure Adam, shall we dive into the classics, Charles Dickens perhaps or Leo Tolstoy".  No.  I have those books. They're the ones I place in front of the actual books I'm reading. (I even have 'the perfect fake reading glasses' for those books).  Oh who am I kidding.  I'm reading everything at arms length if I can't find my dollar store specs. Where was I?  Oh yeah.
       Look I'm no scholar that's clear but I do want to find that perfect book.  You know the one I'm talking about.   For some it was that first Twilight book. For me it was the first time I picked up The Hobbit.   Man I loved that book.  And then the Lord of the Rings.  (Yeah, school was fun! Gay and a nerd.  It get better kids honestly).   I still reread those books to this day.
       More recently I've purchased Sarah Silverman's autobiography "The Bedwetter" and Chelsea handler's "Lies that Chelsea Handler Told Me".   I'm a sucker for a smart deranged woman that can make me laugh. 
       So that should be enough Information right?  Let the onslaught begin.  Make it rain!  Make it rain!  Books I mean, although I will dance for your cash.   See ya at the beach pretending to read Tolstoy ;).

Thursday, 16 June 2011

Look Ma! I'm blogging!

Wow. My Own Blog! Finally an outlet for all those deep thoughts swarming my brain....*cricket chirps*. Oh and who do I have to talk to to change that picture of me? Ugh.